By Shari Benyousky
And Antony Garza
Guest Columnists

DAY ONE – OLD SAN JUAN in CASTILLO DEL MORRO

“How much further Is it?” asked an exasperated middle-aged father in tow behind enthusiastic teenage girls in shorts and pink baseball caps. “And why are we doing this at noon?” The sun glared down on the path between the Fortress walls and the pounding sea waves. “C’mon dad.” They each took an arm. “It’s only a mile.”

To our left, waves hit the sea wall and foam boiled in the swells. We had just rounded the tip of the headland of Castillo Del Morro in Old San Juan, Puerto Rico. El Morro means “forehead” which describes the tip of the deep-water base that the Spanish began building in 1539. It isn’t hard to imagine an enormous Spanish fleet anchored in the bay to our left to gain access to the Red Door Entrance to the city. Now the high walls are pock-marked by age and hurricanes, and a dozen stranded kites bejewel the scrubby shrubs on the walls. Kites? Stick with me here.

Tip: Make sure your hat has a tie under your chin. I had to rig one up from some garbage bag handles to keep my straw hat from blowing into the ocean.

We pass stands of snake plants and dozens of well-fed wild cats on Paseo Del Morro. We climb the steep steps through the dry moat and up into the walls where large iguanas sun themselves out of range of tourists taking selfies along the walls and in the sentry towers which hang over the edges. At the top the vista is stunning: miles of rolling waves and coastline, a half-mile of rolling lawn dotted with tourists and kids flying kites in the stiff breeze. Sure, the history stuff is fascinating, but there are other reasons to love El Morro.

Tip: Before you enter the EL Morro Grounds, stop in front of the lavender Galleria Nacional, and buy a $4 kite as the “forehead” is the absolute queen of kite flying locations.

Walking so much makes one hungry, but several promising restaurants were already full. In desperation, we saw an unassuming little rose-colored sign that said Tropical Taste Puertorriqueño. We HAD been looking for authentic, local food, and this one had a speakeasy feel as we entered a dark store and followed tiny yellow arrows on the ground through the aisles and down winding steps to the restaurant. What had we gotten ourselves into? I wanted sweet plantains with rice and beans, but I didn’t see the words maduros anywhere on the menu. “No, no.” The waiter pointed. “Amarillos. Yellow plantains.” Tony ordered a Fritanga – a trio of Puerto Rican fried items including fried yellow corn sticks, pork-stuffed plantains, and crunchy flat discs of cod. With that and an ice-cold sangria containing real guava seeds, day one was complete. We took an Uber home to our Airbnb back in the Carolina district.

Tip: Uber rides are plentiful and cheap in San Juan. A 15-minute drive costs about $10, and we rarely waited more than five minutes. Get the App. It helps to wear something distinctive so you can send a message to the driver too.

DAY TWO – OLD SAN JUAN in CASTILLO SAN CRISTOBAL

“You have to hold completely still for one full minute.” We were threading our way down the winding tunnels into the dungeon of the second fortress. As we rounded a corner, three college boys were taking selfies in the dim light, one flat on his back on the floor. “Sorry!” they chorused. “It’s for our Instagram.” We took a detour into a side tunnel which turned out to be the dungeon where mutineers from the San Cristobal Artillery brigade had been held awaiting execution in 1855. Scratched on the walls are several gorgeous galleons, the last sentiments of the doomed men who turned the cannons on a panicked city for 24 hours.

Tip: If you like the explore history without a crowd, avoid Saturdays, Sundays, and Mondays as these are the big days for vast cruise ships to dock and disembowel massive waves of guests into Old San Juan.

Castillo San Cristobal is the counterpart to El Morro intended to protect Old San Juan from land-based attacks. It sits about a mile from El Morro, and it is the largest fortification built by the Spanish in the New World, covering 27 acres. Explore it for the numerous tunnels, and two-foot-thick bomb-proof gun ports.

Tip: when you’re starving, try the bookstore on the plaza where the soldiers drilled for the popular Puerto Rican candy Delzura which comes in all kinds of cool tropical flavors. We tried Sesame and Honey Bars and Coconut and Ginger Bites for $1.39 each.

The cannon desk of San Cristobal overlooks a most interesting addition, Cemeterio Santa Maria Magdalena de Pazzi. And yes, you can climb up into the spaces in the walls where each cannon sat. Now the cannons are gone, and you look down into the cemetery which is a jumbled mass of monuments, statues, flowers, and dozens of flags overlooking the vast ocean. If you’re lucky, you’ll hear the rooster and see a clutch of chicks running around, happily co-existing with the dog and the wild cats. We even saw a modern-day pirate in a ruffled purple shirt and pile of gold chains.  

DAY THREE – CATANO ACROSS THE BAY

On your third day, when you’re tired of the narrow lanes of pastel-colored houses, and your eyes are tired of reading plaques, check out the $1.00 10-minute ferry across San Juan Bay to Catano. Buy your tickets online here and get a QR code, because sometimes there’s no one at the ticket window https://www.puertoricoferry.com/en/routes-schedules/san-juan-catano/. When the ferry is running (every 15-30 minutes), it’s the best deal in town. Most tourists cross the bay for the Bacardi Factory Tour, but Catano has other interesting parts, especially if you have kids who are tired of museums.

The Catano boardwalk is a mile-long stretch of playgrounds, sculptures, and themed docks with a lovely view of El Morro across the bay. Check out the Taino Monument for the native people (sometimes you’ll hear the Taino word “Boricua” for Puerto Rico), the rainbow dock, the Puente Rosado where you can lock up your sweetheart’s love, and the dock to highlight Autism. Kids will like the access to shallow bays, a jump off the dock, or making sandcastles. Look for bike and scooter rentals, bubble blowing, and occasional clowns.

When you’re tired, grab a drink and some food at any of the outdoor restaurants or food trucks along the route. Some have live bands, and everyone has lots of local rum. You’ll enjoy the shade with a cold drink and the view across the bay. Be careful though, Puerto Rico often has afternoon storms, so bring your umbrella. If you forget, Uber will pick you up just about anywhere along this route.

Tip: keep an eye out for Greater Antilles Grackles which will eat from your hands and the occasional pelican swooping down for fish.

Now, you’ve spent three quality days soaking up sunburns, afternoon rainbows, and seafood, plus your feet hurt from walking. You’ve noticed that things aren’t cheap in Puerto Rico (the island only produces 15% of its own food, and imports everything else), but people are friendly and laid-back, and you feel rested and ready to curl back in upon yourself in the cold ice of home again.

Que tenga un buen día!

(Have a great day!)

Iguanas (bottom left) are a common sight.

Tony takes a break while site-seeing in San Juan.

Inside a historic dungeon were several gorgeous galleons on a wall.

Intermittent rain often leaves behind a rainbow in San Juan.