By Jeff Burbrink
Ag & Natural Resources Extension Educator, Purdue Extension LaGrange County

LAGRANGE — Every once in a while, you have one of those moments that changes the way you think, or reminds you about what is important. I had one of those moments last week during a visit to a farm several hours from home.

Jeff Burbrink

It was a small dairy farm that sells bottled milk, a rarity these days. Mom, Dad, three busy teenage kids, and some cows. Both parents work off the farm. There were no relatives nearby to help with chores. Still, the milking, hay baling, field work, the bottling, the milk distribution, manure hauling, and all the other chores need to be done. A hard-working group of people to say the least.

As the patriarch described the farm operation, I was struck by the vision this family had, and the dedication it took to run this business despite all the other things going on in their lives. I was scratching my head about how they got everything done. He spoke about family repeated, and I could not imagine how they could pull this off.

As the conversation unfurled, it became clear that the workforce driving the farm extended beyond the immediate blood relation; it also included friends and neighbors who all pitched in to help each other. And he referred to those people as family as well.

Wow! I think that visit made clearer to me that the definition of a family is not solely blood relationships. Family is a group of people that support you, that love you, that you confide in, and give back to. People you go to bat for; people that go to bat for you.

You see these families throughout agricultural communities quite often. When someone is suffering, it’s not unusual to have farmers come together to plant crops or bale hay or harvest grain or milk cows for the ailing “family” member. Our Plain Community is built around this ideal, serving God and His people; I have heard them describe this as “The Culture,” an important part of keeping the community together, something to be cherished and worth preserving. English speaking farmers, too, are quick to pitch in when someone needs the help. It is part of agricultural tradition. And it’s a good thing for us all.

While there are official or legal definitions of what a family is (usually wrapped around blood ties, adoptions, or marriages), its clear to me, more than ever, that a family does not have to be tied to DNA. DNA does not guarantee you will have a good relationship with a person, much less a good working relationship.

In the end, your family members are those you share your life with, in both times of joy and sorrow.