Gary and John Dale

By John ‘Butch’ Dale
Guest Columnist

My brother Gary is four years younger than me. He turned 70 years old in March. When I think of all the things I did to him, its a wonder he made it past childhood. So here and now I would like to say I’m sorry for the following childhood incidents. …

I am sorry about swatting that rock at you with my baseball hat, and it chipped your front tooth off … OOPS!

John ‘Butch’ Dale

I am sorry about that time I was trying to scare you by shooting a BB gun over your head, and I accidentally shot you in the chest. … OOPS!

I am sorry about the time I was trying to teach you how to ride a bike, and I caused you to swerve into a barbed wire fence … and I am really sorry that Dad poured turpentine on the cuts as I held you down and you were screaming. … OOPS!

I am sorry about the time I found a dead mouse in our bed, held it in front of you, and chased you from the bedroom … and you missed the first step and tumbled down the stairs, hit the door … laying there and screaming in pain. … OOPS!

I am sorry I made you play “strip basketball” one winter when there was snow on the ground … and you had to shoot baskets only in your underware. … OOOPS!

I am sorry I threw a fastball to you while we were playing catch in the driveway, and I hit you in the mouth … and called you “butterfingers.” … OOPS!

I am sorry I laughed and threw dirt clods at your bare legs back in the field and made you cry. …. OOPS!

I am sorry I ran over you with the old Dodge truck and got you all scratched up, but at least the tire did not roll over you. … OOPS!

Now … I must ask these questions …

Gary, are you sorry you threw a large rock at me, hit me in the back of the head, and knocked me unconscious … and you laughed when Dad told me to lay still or my brains may leak out? … OOPS!

Gary, are you sorry that as we were playing hide and seek, you stood behind me while I was seated … and you “relieved” yourself on top of my head as I was counting to 100? … OOPS!

Gary, are you sorry that while we were loading ear corn with shovels one afternoon, we ran into a nest of rats … and you hightailed it … leaving me to load the entire truck … and you tried to use that excuse for not helping every time after that? … OOPS!

Gary, are you sorry that afternoon when Dad had us lined up side by side to administer a paddling because of something we did … that I received a “whack” … but you took off running and hid back in the woods … and never got your “whack?” … OOPS!

Gary, are you sorry that you had me make a big list of presents that we wanted for Christmas …. and told me that if we were good, we would receive all of them … and then on Christmas morning, you received toys and a Roy Rogers lunchbox, and all I received was a weird-looking shirt, a baseball, and a tube of Brylcreem hair dressing? … OOPS!

Well, I guess I’m sorry … IF you are sorry … But we both survived!